Ok folks, the hiring/interview process is broken. This wasn't always the case 10 years ago, but in 2016/2017 (time of writing this)..yeah!

I talked to a recruiter once years ago. He looked at my resume and asked me to breakdown "JDBC API" into how many years of experience with "JDBC" and (separately) how many years of experience with "API".

The interview process is the exact analogue of that mindset.

Start by reading the following links, which mirror - 100% exactly - my own recent experiences.

I recently interviewed at some Wall Street companies as well as startups, including your favorite downtown-Seattle based Mega Company. None of the interviewers, at any of these companies, had looked at any code or tutorial I had written, or checked out any app or website I had created. It was all..

to the whiteboard, citizen coder!

..I was polite and egoless and super chill and tried my very best in all these interviews. All I got was terse emails, saying I wasn't technically qualified and/or did not have enough knowledge of basic data structures. Like: none!

The first few times, maybe both LOL-worthy and distressing. At the end of it all, if you are any good, and you encounter this sort of lunacy over and over again, you begin to question your own sanity. But it is not you, it is always them, them being the middle management bozos who have replicated endlessly and filled their ecological niches with remarkable speed.

In a nutshell: you need to start your own company and disrupt a lot of existing spaces, with much smaller yet much more productive teams. If your company does not succeeed, and you need to pay the bills, you are screwed.

You will then end up interviewing at large companies, with giant caverns full of 200+ people, crammed next to each other, all their souls sucked out of their bodies. And having a personality is a strict no-no in any giant cavern sweat shop. Well on your feet, what are you WAITING FOR ? You are in strange building, in a room full of strange people who are staring at you!

to the whiteboard, citizen coder!

The MollyPages ‐ 4 point Hiring Test

(a public service announcement to the corporate borg)

1. Did you contact them first ?

You and your employees should be contacting good people first (when you encounter them anywhere on the web). Maybe they have a fun project or have written some code or posted something interesting. This pre‐selects super qualified people already!

2. Do you like talking to them ?

They could be chill or hyper, but either way, you must enjoy talking with them.

If you contacted them, and you like talking with them, hire them at this point. goto end test

3. Do they have strong opinions ‐ about anything ?

All good programmers are arrogant, or at the very least have strong opinions. People without opinions are people with no personality and should be shitcanned instantly.

The people you hire (a) must have opinions and (b) these opinions should be something you can live/work with for the role under consideration.

4. Do they have a 'net presence ?

They should have published something that impresses you. An app, a website, an article, a tutorial, a demo or some code. Can you find any such presence in the programming world (old usenet posts or any other discussion groups will also suffice).

As an aside, since I've been asked, how does one know they wrote the code themselves ? Had never even considered this as being an issue but if it's any concern, the answer will be obvious when you talk to them. If it is not obvious, it is *you* who is stupid and you shouldn't be hiring anyone.

Do not, under any circumstances, have them take a coding test. Ever. It is the most ridiculous, artificial and unnatural exercise and no real in-demand talent has the time, interest or lack of self respect to waste their time doing this (in an interview context). The code they have already written should speak for itself. Random retard "joel spolsky" has spread this have 'em write code during the interview malign cancer far and wide, with his stupid 12 point list. No surprise that this moron used to work at microsoft. (he gets props for stackoverflow but broken clocks are right twice a day too, jesus what a tedious vile moron).

If the answer to questions 2, 3 and 4 is a strong yes, hire them.

Else do not hire them.

end test

You've hired them, now what ?

Get them working on something. Give 'em a few weeks. If they are delivering stuff, all good. If they aren't able to deliver on time/budget/features (this will mainly be because they have other commitments that you don't know about)...then let them go. Wash, rinse, repeat.